


Don't make this any harder than it already is

by angstyun



Category: TOMORROW X TOGETHER | TXT (Korea Band)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Break Up, Choi Yeonjun Being An Asshole, Established Choi Yeonjun/Kang Taehyun, Heartbreak, M/M, My Heart Is Broken, Sad, Sad Choi Yeonjun, Sad Ending, Sad Kang Taehyun, Soft Kang Taehyun, i'M SAD, it's so sad, taejun
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-10
Updated: 2020-06-10
Packaged: 2021-03-03 22:27:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,384
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24643312
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angstyun/pseuds/angstyun
Summary: Yeonjun is moving to Seoul to chase his dreams, leaving his boyfriend Taehyun behind in the process.
Relationships: Choi Yeonjun/Kang Taehyun
Comments: 6
Kudos: 42





	Don't make this any harder than it already is

"Don't make this any harder than it already is Tyun."

Yeonjun folded the last piece of clothing into his suitcase, his back turned to the teary-eyed red-head. It wasn't his intention to have hurt him, but the situation couldn't be helped. Tomorrow, he was moving to Seoul. He was putting this shitty life behind him. No more bad reputations, no more skipping classes and definitely no distractions.

He hadn't expected to actually get into the idol industry. It was a fleeting dream, one that seemed way out of his grasp, one that had slipped through his fingers more times than he could count. It was never meant to come true, staying as wishful thinking even into his old age. Yet, it seemed fate was telling him to start fresh, put everything on the line in a rush of adrenaline. Even if it meant giving up the one he loved, he had to chase after euphoria.

"It's not your fault. You know that, right?"

Yeonjun zipped up the case, not expecting a response. 

The youngest was slumped against the wall, sat with his legs hugged tightly to his chest. He was fighting back the water that kept pushing to escape, brimming his eyes with pools of overdue sorrow. He wanted to sob to his heart's content, scream from the rooftops about much it ached, bawl about how the break had left his heart jagged and sharp. 

But he sat in silence. He listened to the soft rhythm of the clock, to the rain droplets splashing against the panes of glass. He knew it wasn't his fault. He guessed it was fate telling them they weren't meant for each other, that maybe there was never any red string to start with. He may have seen Yeonjun as a soulmate, but clearly, his feelings weren't reciprocated.

"Did you ever love me?"

The words barely left his lips, appearing as a small, hushed whisper. Yeonjun froze in his tracks, his breath hitching in his throat for a moment. 

"Why would you say that? Of course, I fucking loved you."

Of course, he loved him, hell he still did with all his heart. He never wanted to leave him, to break his heart as a cruel monster would. If he had it his way, he'd take him with him to Seoul. They both needed a fresh start in life. This was their perfect getaway, clean slate. But being an idol meant giving up luxuries; a boyfriend was one thing Yeonjun definitely couldn't have.

"Then...why can't you stay? Why can't we stay together? Why do you have to leave me behind here? What the fuck am I supposed to do without you, Jun? How do I live without you?"

Neither knew the answer. They had been each other's emotional support for so long that it felt wrong to be without the other. The cliff of stability beneath them was crumbling. If they weren't careful, they'd get swept away by the rushing rapids below it. 

"You have to let me go, Taehyun. You'll find someone new, someone, better than I am, better than I could ever be. You deserve that."

Taehyun scoffed, the tears finally spilling over the edges and down his cheeks. He let out a tiny chuckle of disbelief.

"You fucking dumbass. I don't want anyone else! I want you! Choi Yeonjun, I want you. Why is that so hard to understand?" 

No words were said. Only the faint sound of crying could be heard, blending almost with the heavy downpour outside. 

"Why?"

The blonde asked, making his way slowly over to the curled up boy. He seemed cautious, alarmed that touching the fragile figure would end in him shattering for good. He did this to him. He broke him.

"Huh?"

Yeonjun sat in front of him, his heart racing. This was harder than any dance routine, any high note. This was the worst thing he had ever done in his life. It was like a twisted knife through the chest. 

"Why me? Why do you want me when I'm so broken? I have to get away from here, Taehyun. I'm going crazy. I'm going off my marbles in this town and if I don't get out soon, then who knows."

The young boy looked up, their eyes locking onto one another's. Yeonjun felt himself falling into them all over again, getting lost in their glistening beauty and innocence. He wanted to keep it for himself, hold him close and tight and never let him slip out of reach. 

"Because I love you. Nothing will ever change that. You can go away and forget all this but I never will. I'll never forget you, Jun. As long as I'm still breathing, I'll think of you."

Before he could stop himself, Yeonjun's lips were on Taehyun's. Their hearts thumped in union with one another, the sweetness of the other's lips ruined by a bittersweet reality. 

Somehow, Taehyun's lips managed to make everything bad in the world fade into a blur for a moment. Yeonjun could think of nothing but their softness, how they perfectly locked onto his own without hesitation, how they tasted like strawberries and sweet vanilla on a summer's day. 

It was warm and homely, yet painful and heartbreaking. He slipped his hand around Taehyun's waist, pulling him closer and indulging in him more. He never wanted to let go. Because when he did, he would have to say goodbye to him for good. 

They both parted, their breathing heavier and their hearts pounding. The love between them was so strong; it hurt for Yeonjun to even think about turning his back on him. 

But he had to go. 

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that. I shouldn't be here." 

He got up from the floor, the water trickling down his cheeks. The more he wiped them, the more they seemed to flow. It wouldn't stop coming. He had been strong for far too long to break into pieces now. He had to get out of here, escape from all this right now before he gave in to the temptation to stay.

"Yeonjun please."

Snatching the case off the bed, he moved without hesitation. He didn't belong here. The longer he stayed, the more he'd hurt him. The more lasting damage he would do. Taehyun was too kind to hurt like this, too perfect to scar and break. Yet he feared it was too late to go back. 

"Don't leave me, please. Please don't leave me."

Taehyun grabbed the bottom of his shirt, holding it tightly between his fingertips. He hiccuped and cried, desperately trying to make him stay. A shaky breath leaving his lips, Yeonjun couldn't prevent the tears from gushing out. He wanted to stay, but he couldn't.

"Taehyun, please. Let go. Let me go before I hurt you any more than I already have."

The fabric slipped from his grasp, his hands trembling in disbelief. Taehyun thought they'd be together forever, a red string of fate tying them up for life. It seemed he was wrong. He should have believed what they said about him, that he was bad news, that he would break him into pieces and change him. But the boy he fell in love with was sweet, kind and affectionate. He was everything Taehyun needed and more. He cared for him like nobody ever had before, becoming his rock in the process. Now, that rock was crumbling. 

And he couldn't stop it.

"Goodbye Taehyun. You'll always be my first love and I..."

Yeonjun trailed off slowly, taking his leave from the bedroom and down the stairs. He didn't even look back for a moment, afraid that he'd rush back to him in a heartbeat and hold him close in his arms. He had to let him go now. 

Leaving his key on the table, he walked through that door for the last time. It was strange to think he wouldn't wake up there again, holding Taehyun in his arms and indulging in his warmth. 

This was a new start, a new life for both of them. Looking back at the house, he felt everything hit him at once. The sobs escaped through his facade, the words that he hadn't been able to say slipping from his lips.

"...will always love you."

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! 
> 
> I felt like writing something a bit heartbreaking :D This is my first time writing kisses so sorry if it isn't very good T_T
> 
> Please let me know your thoughts in the comments or on my twitter @angstyun ♥ 
> 
> \- Megan


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